abra KADAVER

I am Nifty W. Sodomy. I look like this:

I’m seventeen. Yeah. I know.

I’m probably one of the most intelligent seventeen year olds you’ll ever talk to. No doubt.

I’m a /b/tard.

I’m addicted to Red Bull.

I have the most beautiful dog in the world. She’s better than yours. She’s also an Egyptian goddess.

I strive to one day be an Alaina Beaton-Jeffree Star hybrid.

I can play piano. I also love listening to it.

Matt Skiba is the only man meant for me. Oh. And Henry Rollins.

I am in favor of a partially command economy.

I’m a grammar Nazi.

I have no respect for very young mothers, unless their name happens to be R2.

I once ate an entire carton of ice cream in under five minutes.

I have absolutely no idea what I want to do with my life.

If Brandon Rike, Toby Morell, or Stephen Christian asked me to kill you, I would have no other option but to do it.

I’m as queer as the day is long.

I’m very quick to anger, unfortunately.

I’m Swedish and German. Suck it. <3

I listen to everything. Except gospel. And polka. Fuck polka.

One of the things that differentiates me from my age group the most is that I’m NOT into eighty pound boys who act and dress like girls.

I’m extremely opinionated. I will argue with you about pretty much anything, just because I feel like it.

I used to write a lot. Then I realized that writers are a dime a dozen, and in America’s modern culture they won’t make it unless they write books about faggoty vampires or catty high school girls.

Nietzsche is my hero.

I have so little faith in humanity that even I’m astounded by it sometimes.

I am definitely two things: I am funny, and I am intelligent. Everything else is up to question.

I want to hang out with Velvet Acid Christ someday.

I love piercings. Unless they’re nostril piercings. Those are graosss.

I listen to Twiztid. This does not mean that I am the “family” of every half-retarded white trash imbecile who expects me to be buddy-buddy with him despite the fact that he can’t read and hasn’t showered in three weeks.

I love getting my hair colored. I love getting pierced. I love altering my body in general. By the time I die, I want to have numerous tattoos and piercings. I will also have had every color of hair in the spectrum.

I am extremely anti-religion.

Got questions? Ask.